The Dynamics of Rebuilding Trust and Trustworthiness in Marital Relationship Post Infidelity Disclosure

https://doi.org/10.22146/jpsi.60974

Anselmus Agung Pramudito(1*), Wenty Marina Minza(2)

(1) Gadjah Mada University
(2) Gadjah Mada University
(*) Corresponding Author

Abstract


Infidelity has been one of the leading causes of marital divorce for couples in many countries, including Indonesia. For couples surviving infidelity in marriage, some aspects of the marital relationship such as trust and trustworthiness can be affected. Rebuilding trust and trustworthiness after the disclosure of infidelity can be one of the most important factors in recovering the quality of marital relationship. This research adopted qualitative research method with phenomenological approach to explore the dynamics of rebuilding trust and trustworthiness in marital relationship post infidelity disclosure. The study found that the victim of infidelity rebuilt their trust toward the perpetrator in five aspects. Three of these were personal aspects, including risk identification and prevention, predictability, and belief; and two were relational aspects, including intimacy and reciprocity. Whereas the perpetrators of infidelity rebuilt their trustworthiness by showing four aspects: commitment, openness and honesty, benevolence, and religiosity. Those aspects provided implications in recovery of marital relationship post infidelity disclosure.

Keywords


infidelity disclosure; marital relationship; trust; trustworthiness

Full Text:

PDF


References

Abrahamson, I., Hussain, R., Khan, A., & Schofield, M. J. (2012). What helps couples rebuild their relationship after infidelity? Journal of Family Issues, 33(11), 1494–1519. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X11424257

Allen, E. S., & Atkins, D. C. (2012). The association of divorce and extramarital sex in a representative U.S. sample. Journal of Family Issues, 33(11), 1477–1493. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X12439692

Amato, P. R., & Previti, D. (2003). People’s reasons for divorcing: Gender, social class, the life course, and adjustment. Journal of Family Issues, 24(5), 602–626. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513x03254507

Badan Pusat Statistik. (2018). Jumlah perceraian menurut provinsi dan faktor, 2018.

Badan Pusat Statistik. (2019). Jumlah perceraian menurut provinsi dan faktor, 2019.

Baucom, D. H., Snyder, D. K., & Gordon, K. C. (2009). Helping couples get past the affair: A clinician’s guide. Guilford Press.

Brañas-Garza, P., Capraro, V., & Rascón-Ramírez, E. (2018). Gender differences in altruism: Expectations, actual behaviour and accuracy of beliefs. Economics Letters, 170, 19–23. http://arxiv.org/abs/1606.04900

Brase, G. L., Adair, L., & Monk, K. (2014). Explaining sex differences in reactions to relationship infidelities: Comparisons of the roles of sex, gender, beliefs, attachment, and sociosexual orientation. Evolutionary Psychology, 12(1), 73–96. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470491401200106

Buchan, N. R., Croson, R. T. A., & Solnick, S. (2008). Trust and gender: An examination of behavior and beliefs in the Investment Game. Journal of Economic Behavior and Organization, 68(3–4), 466–476. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jebo.2007.10.006

Burdette, A. M., Ellison, C. G., Sherkat, D. E., & Gore, K. A. (2007). Are there religious variations in marital infidelity? Journal of Family Issues, 28(12), 1553–1581. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X07304269

Buskens, V. (2002). Social networks and trust. Kluwer Academic Publishers.

Derks, J., Lee, N. C., & Krabbendam, L. (2014). Adolescent trust and trustworthiness: Role of gender and social value orientation. Journal of Adolescence, 37(8), 1379–1386. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.adolescence.2014.09.014

Dickie, J. (2015). Trust and conflict resolution: Relationship building for learning. Procedia - Social and Behavioral Sciences, 197, 2066–2073. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sbspro.2015.07.576

Edlund, J. E., Heider, J. D., Scherer, C. R., Farc, M.-M., & Sagarin, B. J. (2006). Sex differences in jealousy in response to actual infidelity. Evolutionary Psychology, 4(1), 147470490600400. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490600400137

Esselmont, C., & Bierman, A. (2014). Marital formation and infidelity: An examination of the multiple roles of religious factors. Sociology of Religion: A Quarterly Review, 75(3), 463–487. https://doi.org/10.1093/socrel/sru036

Evans, A. M., Athenstaedt, U., & Krueger, J. I. (2013). The development of trust and altruism during childhood. Journal of Economic Psychology, 36, 82–95. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.joep.2013.02.010

Evans, A. M., & Krueger, J. I. (2009). The psychology (and economic) of trust. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 3(6), 1003–1017. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.85.3.441

Faturochman, & Minza, W. M. (2014). Exploring Personal and Relational Trustworthiness. Jurnal Psikologi Universitas Gadjah Mada.

Fisher, M., Geher, G., Cox, A., Tran, U. S., Hoben, A., Arrabaca, A., Chaize, C., Dietrich, R., & Voracek, M. (2009). Impact of relational proximity on distress from infidelity. Evolutionary Psychology, 7(4), 560–580. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490900700406

Fisher, M., Voracek, M., Rekkas, P. V., & Cox, A. (2008). Sex differences in feelings of guilt arising from infidelity. Evolutionary Psychology, 6(3), 436– 446. https://doi.org/10.1016/B978-0-12-375000-6.00160-9

Füzér, K. (2016). The social theory of trust and the sociological theory of social capital. Belvedere Meridionale, 28(1), 132–139. https://doi.org/10.14232/belv.2016.1.9

Goetz, A. T., & Causey, K. (2009). Sex differences in perceptions of infidelity: Men often assume the worst. Evolutionary Psychology, 7(2), 253–263. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490900700208

Goldie, M. M. (2013). Infidelity and forgiveness : Therapists’ views on reconciliation and restoration of trust following disclosure of infidelity. All Theses and Dissertations, 3834.

Hardin, R. (2002). Trust and trustworthiness. Russell Sage Foundation. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781119138341.ch14

Haselhuhn, M. P., Kennedy, J. A., Kray, L. J., Van Zant, A. B., & Schweitzer, M. E. (2015). Gender differences in trust dynamics: Women trust more than men following a trust violation. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 56, 104–109. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2014.09.007

Kerr, B., Godfrey-Smith, P., & Feldman, M. W. (2004). What is altruism? Trends in Ecology and Evolution, 19(3), 135–140. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tree.2003.10.004

Kuroki, M. (2013). Opposite-sex coworkers and marital infidelity. Economics Letters, 118(1), 71–73. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.econlet.2012.09.023

Lemmers-Jansen, I. L. J., Krabbendam, L., Veltman, D. J., & Fett, A. K. J. (2017). Boys vs. girls: Gender differences in the neural development of trust and reciprocity depend on social context. Developmental Cognitive Neuroscience, 25, 235–245. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dcn.2017.02.001

Lishner, D. A., Nguyen, S., Stocks, E. L., & Zillmer, E. J. (2008). Are sexual and emotional infidelity equally upsetting to men and women? Making sense of forced-choice responses. Evolutionary Psychology, 6(4), 147470490800600. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490800600412

Luhmann, N. (2000). Familiarity, confidence, trust: Problems and alternatives. In D. Gambetta (Ed.), Trust: Making and breaking cooperative relations (electronic, pp. 94–107). Department of Sociology, University of Oxford. https://doi.org/10.1017/CBO9781107415324.004

Marín, R. A., Christensen, A., & Atkins, D. C. (2014). Infidelity and behavioral couple therapy: Relationship outcomes over 5 years following therapy. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice, 3(1), 1–12. https://doi.org/10.1037/cfp0000012

Mayer, R. C., Davis, J. H., & Schoorman, F. D. (1995). An integrative model of organizational trust. Academy of Management Review, 20(3), 709–734.

Miller, S. L., & Maner, J. K. (2008). Coping with romantic betrayal: Sex differences in responses to partner infidelity. Evolutionary Psychology, 6(3), 147470490800600. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490800600305

Olson, M. M., Russell, C. S., Higgins-Kessler, M., & Miller, R. B. (2002). Emotional processes following disclosure of an extramarital affair. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 28(4), 423–434. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1752-0606.2002.tb00367.x

Peluso, P. R. (2007). Infidelity: A practitioner’s guide to working with couples in crisis. Routledge.

Pitakasari, A. R. (2012, December 11). Kasus nikah siri dan perselingkuhan di Yogyakarta tinggi. Republika Online. http://www.republika.co.id/berita/nasional/jawa-tengah-diynasional/12/12/10/met2ik-wcc-kasus-nikah-siri-dan-perselingkuhan-diyogyakarta-tinggi

Prasetyo, S. E. (2017, May 24). Sehari 16 pasutri minta cerai, selingkuh bukan penyebab utama. Jawapos Online. https://www.jawapos.com/read/2017/05/24/132336/sehari-16-pasutriminta-cerai-selingkuh-bukan-penyebab-utama

Purnama, R. R. (2017, October 4). Perceraian karena sosmed merupakan bentuk lain perselingkuhan fisik. SINDOnews. https://metro.sindonews.com/read/1245315/170/perceraian-karenasosmed-merupakan-bentuk-lain-perselingkuhan-fisik-1507102613

Rempel, J. K., Holmes, J. G., & Zanna, M. P. (1985). Trust in close relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 49(1), 95–112. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.49.1.95

Rousseau, D. M., Sitkin, S. I. M. B., Burt, R. S., & Colin, C. (1998). Not so different after all: A cross-discipline view of trust. The Academy of Management Review, 23(4), 652. https://doi.org/10.2307/259051

Schützwohl, A. (2007). Decision strategies in continuous ratings of jealousy feelings elicited by sexual and emotional infidelity. Evolutionary Psychology, 5(4), 147470490700500. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490700500410

Schwieren, C., & Sutter, M. (2008). Trust in cooperation or ability? An experimental study on gender differences. Economics Letters, 99(3), 494–497. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.econlet.2007.09.033

Shackelford, T. K., Besser, A., & Goetz, A. T. (2007). Personality, marital satisfaction, and probability of marital infidelity. Individual Differences Research, 6(1), 1–18.

Simpson, J. A. (2007). Psychological foundations of trust. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 16(5), 264–268. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8721.2007.00517.x

Smith, J. A. (2009). Dasar-dasar psikologi kualitatif: Pedoman praktis metode penelitian. Nusa Media.

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., & Gordon, K. C. (2008). An integrative approach to treating infidelity. The Family Journal, 16(4), 300–307. https://doi.org/10.1177/1066480708323200

Tagler, M. J., & Jeffers, H. M. (2013). Sex differences in attitudes toward partner infidelity. Evolutionary Psychology, 11(4), 821–832. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470491301100407

Takariawan, C. (2015, February 8). Di Indonesia 40 perceraian setiap jam. Kompasiana. https://www.kompasiana.com/pakcah/diindonesia-40-perceraian-setiap-jam54f357c07455137a2b6c7115

Thielmann, I., & Hilbig, B. E. (2015). The traits one can trust: Dissecting reciprocity and kindness as determinants of trustworthy behavior. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 41(11), 1523–1536. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167215600530

Tim Penyusun Laporan Pengadilan Tinggi Agama. (2015). Data perkara peradilan agama tingkat pertama yurisdiksi mahkamah syar’iyah Aceh/pengadilan tinggi agama seluruh Indonesia tahun 2015. Pengadilan Tinggi Agama.

van Hooff, J. (2017). An everyday affair: Deciphering the sociological significance of women’s attitudes towards infidelity. Sociological Review, 65(4), 850–864. https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-954X.12417

Wardhati, L. T., & Faturochman. (2006). Psikologi pemaafan. Buletin Psikologi, 1–11.

Watson, D. L. (1984). Social psychology, science and application. Scott, Foresman and Company.

Young, K. P. H., Y.Y. Tai, L., Chau, B. C. H., Yim, V. P. L., Kei, L. C., & Cheung, W. Y. (1995). Study on marriages affected by extramarital affairs. Caritas Family Service and the Department of Social Work & Social Administration University of Hong Kong.

Zare, B. (2011). Review of studies on infidelity. 3rd International Conference on Advanced Management Science IPEDR, 19, 182–186.



DOI: https://doi.org/10.22146/jpsi.60974

Article Metrics

Abstract views : 7897 | views : 5567

Refbacks

  • There are currently no refbacks.




Copyright (c) 2021 Jurnal Psikologi

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

 

Recent Issues

Buku 1 Buku 1 Buku 1 Buku 1 
Vol 51 Issue 1 (2024)
Page 1-119
 Vol 50 Issue 3 (2023)
Page 219-332
 Vol 50 Issue 2 (2023)
Page 125-218
 Vol 50 Issue 1 (2023)
Page 1-124
 

 

 


Published by Faculty of Psychology, Universitas Gadjah Mada, Indonesia Building D-6th, Floor No. D-606. Jl. Sosio Humaniora No. 1, Bulaksumur Yogyakarta, 55281
Email: jurnalpsikologi@ugm.ac.id
Phone/whatsApp: +6281125210175

Web
Analytics Made Easy - StatCounter View My Stats